Menu:
Fighting between brothers and sisters
Sibling fighting is very common and most of the times it tends to come with the parenting territory. This springs from rivalry or competitiveness between siblings. To also shows itself through mindless arguments, noisy squabbles, and verbal put-downs and so on. Kids can learn better to resolve conflict than taking refuge in reflexive means like hitting, shouting and so on. The key here for parents is to help their children focus on the problem not their sibling.
As a parent it is difficult to know how to react when children start quarreling, fighting or arguing. They are often perplexed if they need to ignore or get involved in the fight. You can choose to Bear it beat it and Boot them out. Sometimes kids irrespective of the age need some guidance from parents to resolve conflicts.
Focus on emotions first. Its priority to first calm the kids and then help them solve their problems. This would also imply that they sit for a while on their own or they go outside. This will help them let off steam physically. Once emotions are controlled, you can get down to business.
Focus on the problem not the fight. Children often would want their parents to support them rather than the siblings. You can drill down onto the issue. You can then focus on resolving the issue of conflict. As a parent, you must direct your children to focus on the issue and not the fight.
Listen to their story. Kids usually want to be heard. You must listen to their side of the story. You must try to get focus on how they feel about it. In the process, you must also give their emotions a name or a tag. During a lot of times, it can suffice to calm and resolve the situation.
State the problem as you see it. When your children are stuck, you must explain the problem in your eyes. You can brainstorm and then find a solution to that. Restore the relationship. You need to keep focused on the relation than just focusing on the problem. When some young children fight oven an issue, they keep doing that till the parent intervenes. For that, an apology can do by giving a hug or a joint treat for both the kids. This can deviate the fight and make them forget about it. This can lead to a better relation among siblings.
Conflict resolution is easy on paper. However, it is quite hard in practice. By helping the children to resolve their disputes is one of the most difficult tasks. Any teacher can tell you that.
You need to be smart. You can choose to take your time and help your kids. You need to look for opportunities which can help to solve disputes among the children. You should help them focus on the problem and not on the person.